I hope everybody is enjoying their holiday season! As for our journey in the infertility world, we are experiencing the stress that most people endure with this battle. There are so many ups and downs that nobody can prepare you for. The ups have been real ups and the downs have been so down...as for the holidays coming up, magic is in the air...at least we like to think so....this is the time of year the impossible is very possible...Christmas is the time of year where dreams come true. We are holding onto that! :)
For those going through infertility of any situation, just know there are people out there that deal with the same triumphs everyday just like you....I am realizing each day that this infertility bubble we live in is not so small...I recently joined a fertility forum to discuss our journey and I found it very helpful to compare it with other couples across the country. It is hard to explain but I do find comfort in speaking to other women who are living the same life as me everyday going to doctor appointments and being pricked and prodded what feels like everyday! I love speaking to other females across the country about their obstacles and how they deal or even cope with them because I am always full of questions! These women are my heros. I have never conversed with such strong women. I envy their courage and their inner strength as they embark on this journey whether it be their first, second, or even 10th try! I have met several, all at different levels.
For those of you who do read this who are currently in cycle know there is a whole world of women who support you 110%! Patrick and I wish you the best of luck!!!! I have found lifelong friends through this process. As for the staff at FCI, I find such comfort and peace with them. They are the best!!! I could not imagine going through this with any other staff. The support is there through calls of joy and tears of sadness! They are truly remarkable for their daily support and expertise! I trust them with my life. I can not wait to send them pictures of our babies and stop by for annual visits to show them what they work so hard at!
Now on to the good stuff! Our egg donor had her egg retrieval the same day Patrick went in to give his sperm specimen to be combined with the eggs for fertilization. I remember the morning he was advised to go in...he woke up before his alarm, jumped out of bed, and started to get dressed. It was VERY early in the morning. As he was grabbing his wallet and keys, he went over to kiss me on the cheek and whispered to me, " I am going to go make our babies today." It may sound strange, but that is a moment I will remember forever. He then drove to the FCI lab in Chicago, IL where the embryologists were now handling our case. The excitement in his voice was comforting and made my heart glow. At that moment, I knew everything was going to be ok. He was back home before I even had to go to work...
We wanted to delay info to ensure we were being confidential with information concerning our egg donor. We had our donor go through an egg retrieval at an undisclosed date and she yielded us 20 eggs!!!!! This is considered above average from what we were told by the FCI lab!! There were no complications. 16 of those eggs were fertilized by Patrick's sperm, and 14 were considered viable to watch for growth to be scaled! They were watched over several days to determine growth to be ranked as to which had the best chances to implant in my uterus. After days of growth and strict monitoring 24/7, 5 of those embryos were considered healthy. The remaining others degenerated over the growth period. They had no chance of survival. This is how the lab staff knows which ones are the strongest and will most likely survive. We now have 5 embryos in our possession and can not wait to update everybody on news!
Patrick, being a science whiz, loved hearing all the information on our embryos as we were able to decide on which ones to implant and how many. Me, not being a science whiz and not fully understanding the scale the embryologists use, I put him in charge of the information concerning our embryos. He decides which ones to use and how many because he understands everything about them the most. Thank goodness one of us understands the embryo stages because I sure don't! Stay tuned for more info on our journey!
Happy Holidays! :)
Friday, December 10, 2010
As I am continuing forward on our journey, I have been advised that being stress-free is essential from this point forward. I have been reading forums and talking to others about their best de-stressing strategies. I have been going shopping (which gets expensive!) after work to clear my mind. I think just walking around and being around Christmas shoppers is relaxing to me. I have been cleaning and doing mini projects around the house every night which is very nice being so productive! Also, after Birdies for Babies, a program called Circle + Bloom (http://www.circlebloom.com/) reached out to me to try their product. My response is of course, I will try anything! I recently tried it and it was AMAZING! Circle + Bloom is a download that you put on your iPod. It is a total body relaxation. I found that it cleared my mind and went into a state of deep relaxation. I have never ever been that relaxed in my entire life. I listen to it occasionally before bed. I find it very soothing and calming. I see the importance of trying to stay relaxed during this process. Stress is the enemy; Good and Bad stress… you can’t win! Haha I have to try and keep my excitement and despair to a minimum to maintain the equilibrium. Very hard for me being that I am an anxious person by nature. Keeping our fingers crossed and keep the prayers going…